Over the course of a couple weeks they went out in teams and made numerous supply runs and trips to the farm. Tom's health was improving and he was itching to get out of the house and be productive, but they still restricted his activity to only the house, patrolling the fence, looking for security breaches or potential issues. He was ordered rather forcefully that he would gradually regain his strength and return to full duty when and only when he was ready for it. He was getting cabin fever. Each night they'd check in at mealtime and they'd cross things off their lists and they'd make a new list if need be. They gathered two additional trucks, which they left at the farm, tucked into the barn. Jay found another box truck, which they left at the house. Any car battery they found they removed and took to the farm house till they had the number that Tom had given them. Tom was proud of their work. They were fast and they didn't complain, but it was worth the effort. He praised them, saying they'd have that farm house up and running in no time.
Julia gave Tavin a separate list that only included shot guns and ammunition for the shot guns. "What are we doing with this?"
"Get me all you can find. I have an idea. Trust me and this we'll do together. It's our side project. And it's totally separate. It doesn't go into our cache."
"Whatever Julia." He yelled, throwing his hands up in the air. "What the fuck ever you want."
"Tav, it's important. Please!" She called after him. He gave her the finger, but he did what she asked.
Since they had Kevin on the road with them, Julia decided it was time for Hayley to come out of her room and give her something to do. She offered Hayley a spot on the team that went out daily, but she said no. She was withdrawn and depressed. No one knew what Hayley thought about better than Julia and they were losing her. She never came out of the room other than to eat and do wash for her and Kevin. Even though she and Kevin had formed a very tight friendship, she spoke rarely to anyone else. Julia went to her room and told her to get up and get moving. They were going out.
"I don't want to." Hayley replied.
"Get up or I'll get you up. 15minutes, downstairs."
Julia waited. They were going on foot, Luz knew where they were going, said they'd be back.
"Where are we going?" Hayley asked, following Julia's lead.
They walked in the cold air in silence, observing their surroundings until they reached the neighboring development. They walked up the street toward the cul-de-sac. They went to Bob's house, knocked on the door and called from the outside. He peeked through the window that he'd covered like they told him to do. At night he'd be more obscured that way from both the living and the dead. He opened the door and let them come inside. He'd cleaned up some, both himself and the house.
"How are you doing over here, Bob?" Julia asked sitting at the kitchen counter with him.
"I'm doing alright." He answered. "What are you gals doing here?"
"I came to get something from one of the houses, but also came to see you. Check and see if you needed anything."
"I'm pretty well off here. Thanks to you all leaving me that house down the block a ways I have been able to get this far." He answered. Julia saw he was still scared to leave the house.
"You need anything? Need us to get you something. It's hard all alone, Bob."
"I think that I'll get through the winter fine."
"Look, my offer still stands, Bob. You changed your mind yet? We have room. You can come with us."
"No. I want to stay in my house."
They chatted about the winter weather, the dead that they've seen, the solitude. He thanked them for dropping in. Told them to come back anytime. As they were leaving they noticed a small Christmas tree in the corner on a table. Julia smiled, Bob wanted to live.
They went a few houses down and Julia went inside, slowly verifying each room was clear and as they'd left it when they were here last. She tucked what she came for in her back pack and they left, heading back the same way they came.
"Did we clear all the dead out of here, Julia?"
"Hayley, we're never going to clear all the dead out of anywhere." Julia answered. "Just like we can't clear them out of our heads, dead ones or live ones and what they've done to us." Hayley listened, still alert to her surroundings. "Are you getting close to Kev?" She asked her.
"Not that way no. He's a great guy. He's strong and he's-I trust him. He's a good person, looks out for me from the day we met. Callie was interested in him, but he told me he'd wait as long as I wanted. I let him hold me sometimes. He's kissed me a couple times. I can't bring myself to-you know. And I'd like to. Rey and Andy have offered to clear out for us to have some alone time and that was sweet of them."
"What do you think will happen to you if you're alone with him? I know that I'm the last person that you want to talk to about anything, and our situations were totally different, but maybe let him show you some affection. It'll help you heal, it'll help you trust again."
"I'd love to, but I'm nervous about it."
"He sees that already, Hayley. If he's waiting for you to feel comfortable, that may never completely happen."
"How did you do it with Jay?"
"I didn't." Julia answered. "It was all we thought about while he did it. Getting past that together, well, that was difficult. Jay has his ways."
"You know it's your fault I got out. You told me after Caleb that I would be the kind of person to lay there and take it and let myself get killed. I remembered that when I escaped them. I remembered that every time I was scared and wanted to give up."
"Thinking back I should have never been so mean to you about that. I should have been more understanding. It would have saved us a lot of grief."
"We're never going to be best friends again, Julia. I have tried to stay out as much as possible, not get in anyone's way, especially yours and I haven't spoke to Jay at all other than at dinner."
"Why? That's silly. We have to learn to trust each other again. Hayley, I stand with and work with his brother everyday. You need to come out of hiding. You have a lot to offer. If you didn't we wouldn't have brought you in."
"What's in the bag? What did you get at the house?"
"Wine." Julia answered. "I am tired of everyone being so miserable in that house. Everyone's tense and on edge. We're going to have a party and celebrate."
"We are? What's the occasion?"
It's my birthday. I'm getting white girl wasted. Julia thought. "We're all done with the supply runs. We have everything we need for the farmhouse." Julia answered instead.
"Oh, cool. That's awesome."
"Look, I have something I need to get. Can you pull into that shopping center? I'll only be a few minutes." Jay asked, seeing the novelty store from the road. They'd driven past it everyday for the last few days. It had been one of Julia's favorite stores.
"I want to go home, Jay. We still have to take this load over to the farmhouse and leave it there, too." Tavin said.
"Come on. It's important. 5 minutes. I need to get something for Julia."
"She gave you a list too?" Tavin asked rolling his eyes.
Jay pulled his gun out, "No, she didn't." Jay jumped out once Tavin pulled the truck to a stop. He pulled out his flashlight and went slowly through the store, a pretty open layout with no aisles. He didn't see anyone alive or dead, but needed to check anyway. Feeling confident he was alone, he tucked his gun back in his waistband and grabbed a little backpack. Notebooks and some cool pens was first on his list, then he went to the make up aisle where he scanned it until he found the hair ties and head bands and bows and what not. Lastly, he found the razors and stuffed all they had in the bag. On the way out the door saw a graphic tee that read 'cause I'm the boss, that's why'. He found a size small and tucked it into the bag. He got selfish for a moment and stuffed a store bag with candy. Even though that wasn't why he came inside, he wanted something for the kids and chocolate and sweets were always in demand.
"Told you, 5 minutes." Jay said as he climbed back inside the cab of the truck.
Tavin drove away, to the farmhouse, in a mood till Jay opened the candy bag. "Swedish fish? Gimme some." He grinned like a little kid, holding out his hand.
"Hey, where'd all the candy come from?" Julia asked as Jay came out of the bathroom. She followed him to the bedroom, sucking on one of the blow pops that was on the table for the kids. Jay closed the bedroom door, started drying off.
"Stopped somewhere this afternoon is all." He answered. "It's a special day, Julia, you know."
"It is?" She asked, looking hopeful at him.
"Oh, yeah, we finished getting the supplies. Everything's at the farmhouse. We're ready finally to start our build, move on, you know."
"Oh, of course. Yeah." She nodded, taking a seat on the bed.
Jay took the brush off the dresser top and handed it to her. He sat in front of her and she started brushing his damp hair. "Hey, my hair tie is under my clothes, could you get it?"
Julia got off the bed and moved his clothes. She found the back pack beneath the pile. A pink and gaudy, glittery back pack. "Jay," She said, picking it up. She unzipped it, looking inside. "You remembered."
"The bakery was closed, so there's no cake." He finished brushing his hair while she dumped out the bag and examined her new notebooks.
"Thank you, Jay. I thought-"
"You're welcome."
She started laughing as she looked at her tee shirt. She set the blow pop on the sill and held it up. "This is perfect." She laughed, pulling off the tee she was already wearing and pulling her new one on. "What do you think?" She smiled, holding her arms out as she modeled her new tee. "I Love it, Jay. And my new books. They're sturdy. Won't fall apart."
"Can we have sex, babe? I've been thinking about it-you-all day." He said, leaning back on the bed.
Julia kicked off her pants, crawling onto the bed, then on top of him. "I think we should have a lot of sex today." She smiled, pulling his towel off him.
During dinner Tavin broke open the wine bottle Julia had given him. Tavin filled up glasses as they were held out in front of him. Tavin started the evening meeting, stating they'd finished with supplies and tools, they had what they needed at the farm. He released Tom from his medical restrictions officially. It was a culmination of efforts, men and women alike, and "Tonight we celebrate." Julia told them all.
"Julia, mind if I put on some music?" Hayley asked, pulling out her iPhone. "I have a million songs downloaded on this thing. And Kev found me a speaker."
"Yeah, sure please."
Music and wine and happy people. Julia noticed Tavin sneaking away, exiting via the back steps. She chased after him. "Tav, are you an alcoholic, too?" She asked.
"No, I'm not. Why?"
"Come back and have a drink."
"I don't want to drink."
"Come back and have fun, please."
"I'm good, Red."
"Come on, there's gonna be drunk women. You could get lucky." She teased.
"Funny, real funny. Luz is looking kinda hot tonight." He joked sarcastically. He took another step up.
"Please, stay a while. It's my birthday."
"It is? Happy birthday." He said, thinking that's why Jay made him stop at that store. He'd gone in for more than a bag of candy for the kids. He thought a moment, "What the hell." He came back down the steps.
Julia led the children to the attic, changing Tatia into pajamas, tucking her into the mattress she used as her bed. Alex, Frankie and Daniel readied themselves. "Where's Kelly?" Her brothers asked.
"She's downstairs. She's old enough. You guys are not and it's bed time. Good night." She told them, watching Tatia dozing off. "Keep the sound down so you don't wake her up." Julia advised as they all pulled out iPads and Nintendo ds's.
On her way back to the party she saw Callie laying on the bed reading a book. "You don't want to join us?"
"Nope. Thanks." Callie answered, looking over her novel at Julia.
"I thought you were moving out of the room, Callie."
"He did. Not me. He's staying in with Tom now."
"Are you sure you made the right decision, Callie? I mean did you really think it through."
"Some things are not meant to be." She answered, going back to her book.
"You're right, Callie. Doesn't mean you have to give up hanging out with us though. If you change your mind, then you know where we are."
Julia went back to the party. Music played. Andy and Rey danced. Hayley and Kevin sat on the sofa talking, sitting close to each other. Jess sat at the kitchen counter, singing along to a song that played. Music. She hadn't heard music in a while. A FloRida song played and Julia cringed, thinking they would have to listen to that the rest of her life She watched Kelly stand at the table gawking at the boys that had started a card game. Julia pulled another bottle of wine out of the back of the fridge where she'd stashed it earlier to keep it cold. She and Jess managed to get it open and pour some more into their glasses.
"Kelly, come here." Julia called, pouring her a small amount of wine into a glass. She handed it to Kelly. "How old are you again?"
Kelly had to be the most shy of the group, lumped in with the kids, she always was viewed as one. "You're like 12, right?" Jess asked, watching as Kelly sniffed the wine before she tasted it.
"No, I'm 14 now. My birthday was in January."
"So you had a boyfriend right?"
"I had a friend." Kelly answered, still sniffing the wine. Jess tipped the glass so the liquid moved toward her mouth.
"What all did you do with your friend, Kell?" Jess asked, smiling. "Other than draw."
"Hung out at school. I wasn't allowed to go anywhere with him. My dad was strict on that."
"Your dad, my dad, everyone's dad, but that never kept me and Jay from hooking up." Julia said. "So was he a good kisser?"
Kelly blushed, thinking of her friend that she'd never see again. "Yes."
"So you would go draw, but really make out." Jess said.
"No, we would do both."
"Did you and him go all the way?"
"In the art room at school? No." She gasped. "We never, we didn't." Kelly said, shaking her head.
"We're not your parents, Kelly. You don't have to be shy or anything with us." Julia told her. "So do you like any of the boys?"
She took a drink of the wine. "I liked Andy. But I'm obviously not his type." She pointed out. "You are so lucky to have your boyfriends here. Everyone has a boyfriend."
"How about girls? You into girls."
"You mean Cass? No."
"What about Cass?" Cassidy yelled over to them from the table.
"Cass isn't gay, Kelly." Julia laughed. "She thought you were gay, too."
"Well I'm not." Cass shot back. "Christ, don't fill her head with shit like that. Cause you two hump on each other doesn't mean I want a side chick."
"You have to have someone in order to have a side piece, Cass." Tavin told her.
"I do. I just don't put it out there. Neither does he."
"Who is he?" Julia asked. The table of people just looked at her.
"Mind your own business."
"You two hook up?" Kelly asked, distracting them from Cass's mystery man.
"You leave that girl alone." Jay told them.
"We're not messing with her like that." Jess told him.
"Sometimes." Julia answered her question. "So, who's the hottest one over there?"
Kelly looked nervous and stepped away from them. "Come on, stop." She blushed again.
"Ok, sorry. I was trying to include you is all. You shouldn't have to be stuck with the kids all the time."
"I'm-it's just that they're all-I don't think about them like that." She explained. "And they're your boyfriends and all and I can't like them like that. That's all."
"So let's pretend that none of us were here and you didn't know any of us and you saw them on the street. Which one is the cutest?"
"All of them are, I guess." She answered. "Jay has a nice smile though."
"He does. That's one of my favorite things about him. When he smiles, his whole face smiles." Julia said.
"Chess is very polite. I like he holds the door for me and helps me if I need it."
"You don't know Chess very well then." Julia said, shaking her head.
They listened to the music that played. Andy suggested that Kelly get her sketch book and show the girls what she sketches. So she went to the attic and fetched her books. While she was upstairs Andy told them to lay off her. He scolded the girls, told them they were making her feel uncomfortable and picking on her like mean girls.
They took the sketch books and were amazed at what they saw. Glimpses of fear and death that stalked them. The grim reaper with his sickle standing over graves with the dead alive at his feet. A lot of anime and manga. Then everyone in the house. Kelly explained she'd been working with Doug when he was free and had learned how to sketch faces. The girls interrupted the card game and set the book on the table. Julia and Kelly stood by Tavin's seat and when Julia set the books on the table, she nudged Kelly closer to Tavin. She blocked his view with her body. Julia put her hand on Kelly's shoulder and sat her down, so he could see. She wound up in his lap.
Tavin looked up at Julia, then at Kelly, then back to Julia.
"Hey, Tav. It's you. The likeness is amazing."
Once the sketch books were put away and the cards put away, the small crowd of people dispersed. Kelly went off to the bathroom and Julia gave her a third refill of wine. Julia and Jay sat at the table with Tavin who was thinking about going upstairs to sleep. "Are you crazy?" Julia asked, adding more wine to her glass.
"Why?"
"Man, she put a virgin in your lap and you're going to bed? Alone?"
"Are you serious? It's Kelly."
"She hasn't budged from your side in like an hour and a half. You've been talking to her longer than that. Put the moves on her." Julia urged.
"I don't know." He said.
"You yourself said times have changed and in the real world you wouldn't even look twice at her. You get up and walk away from this table and she comes back and you're gone, she'll be upset. At least hang out."
"You want me to bang a 14 year old virgin. Do you know what's coming out of that? Feelings. That's what. She's gonna catch feelings."
"And so what if she does. Do you know what you can do with her? She's a lump of virgin clay. I'm not saying go up and bang her back out for Christ's sakes. I doubt she's ready for all that, or maybe she is. Who knows? By the way, who's Cass fucking with?" Julia asked.
"Doug." Jay answered.
"Really? Him. Why didn't you tell me?"
"Thought you knew already."
"I don't keep up with who's fucking who." Julia said. "There's no book for that."
Kelly did return and was standing next to Tavin again scared to sit back on his lap. He took her hand and sat her back down, then handed her the glass that Julia had filled. Hayley and Kevin told them good night as they went upstairs. Andy and Rey sat on the floor by the fire, beneath a blanket. Julia took Jay's hand and led him to the couch to sit down. They took Hayley's phone off speaker and played with the phone while switching up songs. He poked her, motioning for her to look in the dining room where Tavin and Kell were kissing. "Think he's in?"
"I have no idea. Never know."
Julia started dozing off, turning away from watching the boys make out, she cuddled against Jay's chest. He had been twirling her hair, kissing her neck, and she drifted off till she heard Chess in the living room complaining. "What's wrong now?"
"I don't appreciate getting kicked out of my room." He mumbled, setting up his area behind the sofa with Jess.
"Who kicked you out?"
"Tavin said he was taking the room and threw me and Jess out."
"Just tonight." Jess reminded him. "It's not forever." Jess took a seat on the couch, looking at the phone.
"I guess we're kicked out too." Jay said.
"Join the club." Rey added. "We were asked nicely and agreed. For Hayley."
"Let them have their fun please. You remember what it's like being a virgin and who wants to lose their virginity laying next to Chess?" Julia said. "That's something that requires privacy, right?"
"You are the last person who should talk about private. He was an inch away from banging you in a room full of people in my basement." Chess reminded her.
"Chess everyone fucked in your basement at one point or another." Jay added. "That basement was the place to go if you wanted some or wanted to try to get some."
"That basement rec room claimed many virgins." Chess added. "It was amazing, the power of the basement. It started with my oldest brother. He always had the weed and the girls. So many girls."
"I almost got laid about ten times down there. Seriously girls everywhere. All the girls were there."
"His brother Ray?" Andy asked, a bit confused.
"Nah, my oldest bro, Nathan. He's at school. Well, he was at school. Couldn't get hold of him."
"What school?"
"NYU. He always wanted to get away from home. Always thought there was bigger things outside of Maverick and he was good at everything. Baseball, basketball, track. He was real fast. Got a scholarship for track of all things, but what he loved was baseball." Chess quieted down, thinking about his brothers. "Geeze, how long's he going to take up there?"
"Look at this." Jay said to Julia. He had opened up the photo album and was flipping through the pictures. He closed the album, then opened it again to the beginning. "Think she knows this is on here?" He asked as he scrolled through the pics that documented part of what those boys at the house in Maverick had done to her. It reminded Julia of Caleb Downing's pictures.
" I doubt it. Why would she save them?"
"What are you looking at?" Chess's head popped up from behind the sofa. He looked over their shoulders. He looked away. "Fuck. Delete that shit."
"There's video, too." Jay mumbled.
"Delete that. She doesn't know it's there." Julia said to him. "She can't know it's there. No one would save that." She finally looked away. She couldn't look anymore.
Jay hit delete on the pictures, all of them and their ugliness. He hit play on the video, listened them tell her how she liked them on her like that as she cried. Jay stopped the video and deleted it and the two that followed it. He deleted all the pics that they'd ever taken together including the ones from the dance and prior to that. He kept flipping through the pics all the way back to him and Hayley and before that.
"Enough with the pics, Jay." Julia said, annoyed with his trip down memory lane. "I don't need to see you making out with her."
"Sorry, Jules." He said, closing the photo album. He flipped back to the music. "Too far back."
"Yeah, too far back."
Julia went to the table and got her glass of wine. She'd started to lose her buzz. She finished it off and grabbed the bottle by the neck from the fridge. "I'm not feeling this wine shit. Gotta drink three bottles of it to get drunk."
"It's about 6 proof." Jay told her, passing on more.
"I miss vodka. Chess, you got some?"
"Maybe. But it's for a special occasion." He answered honestly.
"What's a special day around here? Not dying?"
"Ha, funny. I don't know. But it's staying hidden."
"This is boring. What did people do in their free time way back in the day?" Andy asked.
"Farm. Milk cows. I don't know. Shoot outs? Bar fights."
"I miss television." Rey said.
"I miss the internet." Julia said.
"I miss internet porn." Chess called from behind the sofa.
"I miss potato chips." Jess smiled, taking a drink from the bottle.
"I Just want to run, and not for my life." Jay announced.
"All the stuff we had and did and you miss running?" Rey asked surprised.
"Yeah, it's how I keep in shape. And how I work out my stress. Just running and thinking. Feeling my heart beat and the adrenaline rush. Nothing like it."
"And now what? We're going to have to come up with something to do."
"We can have sex." Jay said, pulling her onto his lap.
"Who's gonna get pregnant first?" Rey asked. "Would anyone like to place a bet?"
"I don't want to think about that. How do you deliver a baby?" Julia asked.
"How pregnant would you be now, Julia?" Andy asked.
"Umm, 6 months maybe?"
"How would you do everything you do pregnant?" Jess asked.
"I wouldn't." Julia answered. "It could happen, to anyone. I'm good for a few years with this thing inside me."
"How do you get it out?" Chess asked.
"No clue, but that's a long way off. Hopefully, by then..."
"You really think that by then any of us will still be alive?" Chess asked. "That's why I don't care now. We pretty much have a death sentence hanging over us."
"Then why bother with anything we have planned? If there's no hope for a future."
"We're going to starve to death before we turn. End of story."
"Chess, don't talk like that."
"Has anyone even considered that? I can't be the only one who feels this way."
"So why not stay here and scavenge until there's nothing left and then move on to the next place, like vagabonds? There is a way to live, we have to learn it."
"Who's teaching us? I trust you, Julia and I believe in you, but be realistic."
"I'm trying to be realistic and practical. While we have enough people to get this thing off the ground."
"I'm with you 100%." Chess said.
Julia continued drinking. She went and got her book from the table.
"No, no, no. Not tonight, Julia. No." Jay warned her. "I swear, Julia, put that fucking thing away."
"What? The book?"
"You start writing ideas and feelings I will throw it outside." Jay warned again.
"And I'm still fucking bored." Andy announced a minute or so into silence.
"So what? If we were home, back in Maverick, this is the same shit we'd be doing there. Still the same people and still bored. Am I right?"
"Only we'd be high as fuck right now." Chess called from behind the sofa. "I want some weed. I hate not being high."
"Chess, wanna grow some?" Julia asked.
"Some weed? Yes. Julia. Yes. You're a fucking genius." He screamed, popping his head from the rear of the sofa. "Yes!" He squealed excited. "Julia! That's our fucking crop! I think it's the only shit we'll know how to grow! Yes!"
"Chess, you may be onto something." Julia nodded. " A weed farm with some tomatoes on the side."
"It grows like a weed. Who doesn't smoke weed?"
"A lot of people, Chess." Rey answered.
"And why don't they smoke weed?" Chess asked excited. Julia had never seen Chess so excited. "Because they'll get in trouble. Because they'll lose their job. Because they'll go to jail. Not anymore! Who works? No one. Who's gonna get in trouble? No one."
"Chess, ok. You can plant weed. God." Julia laughed
"We're gonna smoke weed."
"In like 6 months, man. Calm down."
"No more drug free no more drug free anything. Aaaah, it's gonna smell so good."
"I'm in." Jay agreed.
"I saved those seeds for a reason. I did. I knew it would pay off." Chess said. "I knew it."
They heard feet on the steps. "What are you so excited about?" Tavin asked. He head toward the kitchen. Kelly followed him downstairs, looking around the room at everyone who stared at her like she had the plague. She wore Tavin's shirt, bare legs, her long brown hair down around her face and chest. She went to the kitchen with Tavin, following him quickly.
"Did she just do the walk of shame or what?" Jay whispered.
"Awe, she's wearing his shirt." Julia whispered back. "Remember when I used to wear your shirt?"
"Awe, like when you used to follow me around all in love."
"I think it was the other way around."
"Romeo, can we go back to our room now?" Chess called. "It's been like three hours already."
"Yeah. If I want it, I'll just come take it again."
"No more of that. I'm serious." Chess yelled, taking his blankets and pillows off the floor. Jess followed Chess. Julia offered their room to Andy and Rey who went upstairs behind them. Tavin leaned on the counter in the kitchen. He guided her closer to him, his hand on the small of her back.
"Julia, you gave our bed to your brother and his boyfriend."
"Yeah, I was feeling generous. Anyway it's quiet down here and I like the fire."
"I know all about the fire, Jules."
Julia took a drink from the wine bottle, then pulled the blanket around the both of them. Before Tavin went back upstairs, he stopped at the bottom of the steps. "Tomorrow morning at breakfast, we need to rearrange the sleeping arrangements, Julia."
"Alright. Sounds good. First thing." Julia replied. "You guys wanna stay down here?" Tavin and Kelly were quiet.
"Look I'm not shy, so I just wanna know where I'm getting laid." Jay announced, setting Julia aside and getting up from the sofa. Jay was getting annoyed. Julia got up from the sofa.
"Callie's alone in the room. Cass is with Doug in the closet." Kelly announced shyly.
"What closet?"
"The big huge closet on the second floor next to the steps. They moved in there together." Kelly explained. "She's got a room to herself. And I think since you two are in charge of everything-"
"Tavin, why wouldn't you mention this since Audrey's dead? No one rooms alone here." Julia asked annoyed.
"Not now, Julia."
"He didn't want to be disrespectful to her." Kelly said in her soft voice.
"She broke it off with him."
"He's being a gentleman." Kelly said, defending him.
Oh, Lord, it's starting. Julia thought. She's addicted. It only takes once.
Julia tread the stairs lightly to the 2nd floor. Her 3 companions followed her hesitantly. Julia opened the door slowly and she still lay reading the novel, nearly finished when she walked in on her for the second time. The 3 stood back away from the door way. She felt like she was leading them into battle. Julia chose to be upfront with her.
"You need to move to the couch. We'll changing the sleep arrangements first thing in the morning."
Callie stood up, novel still in hand. She pulled her pack from the floor next to the bed and walked past her and the other three in the hall without a word.
Tavin and Kelly took the bed and Jay and Julia lay on the mattress across the small room. Kelly flipped the switch on the lamp and the room was only lit up by the dim moonlight. Then as Kelly lay snuggled against Tavin's chest, she faced the direction of Jay and Julia's mattress. Tavin knocked out fairly quick, his arms wrapped around her. She watched as Jay's body moved above Julia's, their bodies moving slowly casting shadows on the wall. She watched Jay's butt as it moved, the swing of his hips, the expanse of Julia's thighs where Jay lay. She listened carefully as the muffled sounds of pleasure escaped their mouths. Kelly fell asleep watching them.
Jay was awake before any of them. Something woke him, a familiar sound but unfamiliar in the house. His stomach flopped as he scrambled to put on his clothes.
"Tav, yo. Brother. Wake the fuck up." He called, pulling his jeans on.
"Jay, what's wrong?" Julia mumbled half asleep.
"Tavin." Jay called, stepping over Julia. He pulled his shirt on over his head then flicked on the lamp.
"What, Jay? What fucking time is it?"
"Shut up. Listen." Jay urged.
"I don't hear anything, Jay."
"There's one in here. In the house."
Tavin pulled his jeans on.
"Where's your shit?"
"Down in my room. In Tom's room. I moved remember."
Jay reached for his knife, which was in the room with Chess and Jess next door. Jay banged on the wall, calling Chess.
"Where is it coming from?" Tavin asked. "Up here? Upstairs? Second floor?"
"Chess, fuck. Wake up."
"Where's your knife, Jay?"
"Next door with Chess. With my clothes and the rest of my shit." Jay paused, listening. "Not upstairs, but we gotta get out there before it goes upstairs. Fuck, the kids are sleeping up there."
"Julia, she got her knife on her?"
Jay shook his head. "I'll go." Jay opened the door an inch or two, enough to peek into the hall way. It was clear, but once the door opened Jay knew it was on the steps. "Stay here." Jay slipped out then to the room next door. He grabbed his gun and head back into the hall way in the dark. Tavin's head poked out of the room, asking for a knife. "It's Callie, Tavin. Go back." The threat came from inside the house and there was only one as far as he knew. Jay thought about shooting and wanted to shoot. She appeared stuck on the steps. Walkers didn't climb very well. Jay went down a few steps and kicked it in the head, knocking her backwards. She fell half the stair way to the 2nd floor landing, laying on her back looking up at him with familiar eyes. As she righted herself onto unsteady legs, Jay kicked her down the next flight of stairs to the first floor. He chose to draw her outside. He chose not to make more of a mess in the house. He chose to sacrifice her outside. Jay held the gun as he made his way into the living room, gun up he looked around for anyone she'd attacked before ascending the steps. They were very lucky that she hadn't got the first person who woke up in the house. Very lucky that everyone slept with their doors shut tight. Very lucky she wasn't as agile in death as she was in life.
Jay went to the front door and she followed. She followed her hunger and she followed to satisfy that hunger. Jay backed down the front steps and she stumbled, fell and landed in the snow at his feet. Before she rose again, he fired the gun. The bullet exploded her brain and skull onto the driveway. He was met by his brother in the doorway, but he'd already covered her with his shirt.
"Check the others. Make sure they're ok."
The gunfire woke the house up, bringing people and weapons from each room and level of the house. Kelly jumped off the bed and woke up Julia. She shook her in a panic. Julia started pulling clothes on, and ran downstairs to a crowd in the doorway. She pushed through and saw Jay holding a gun. "Who did you shoot, Jay?" Julia asked. She saw Tavin kneeling in the snow by a covered body. Both of them stunned and shirtless and shoeless.
"Callie." He answered, shivering.
Julia went to them, she crouched in front of the body, pulled back the tee that covered her head, then replaced it when she saw the entrance wound. She picked up Callie's hand and noticed that her wrist had been cut open. She showed Jay and Tavin. "Everyone, come on. Back inside."
"I got him, Julia. Go make sure everyone else is ok. Head count." Jay ordered.
"Yeah, ok." Julia said, shooing those who were awake back into the house. She went floor by floor and made sure everyone was accounted for and untouched by her. The kids in the attic still slept soundly, except for Alex who was woken by the gun shot. He was scared, but he stayed put and had guarded the door with the fire place poker from their last breech.
"That's good, Alex. Thank you for keeping them safe. But everything is alright now." Julia explained, calming him down. She tried to take the poker from him, but he refused, tucking it back into bed with him.
"This is my weapon. You can't have it." He told her and he was serious. The look on his face said it all. He'd placed himself in charge of the attic dwelling. "I have to take care of my sister."
"You're right. I can't have it. You should have it in case you need it." Julia agreed. "Do you have any other weapons up here?"
"No." He answered her. "Jay said he'd take care of me and if I had to I would take care of her."
"Alright. Good job, big brother."
"He showed me how to kill them, Julia. He said not to be afraid. He said to poke them in the eye ball real fast."
"Jay said that."
"Yes. I stay by the door and I don't let them in here." Alex added to his story. "I need something, Julia. He gave me this bag that had food and water in it in case we got stuck here for awhile. Please don't tell Jay, but we ate all that stuff he gave me."
"Gimme the bag. I'll replace it." Julia said.
"Don't tell Jay. He'll be mad." He begged her with his brown eyes.
"I won't tell Jay." She swore, taking the empty bag from him.
Julia got the people settled down, found that Callie had cut her wrist in the bathroom on the second floor. She left the door open and had crept down the hall and to the steps. She'd passed several rooms that held sleeping people, leaving a bloody trail from the bathroom to the stairwell where she'd attempted to get upstairs. The stairwell where Jay had found her. The place was a mess. Blood from the second floor over the stairs and through the living room out the door to the driveway. She had a mess to clean up and on a couple hours sleep. Julia was not in a pleasant mood. She was angry that this had even happened to begin with. What had she been thinking? Julia asked herself.
Julia started mixing up soapy water again. She started in the bathroom upstairs and scrubbed it clean. She scrubbed the hall floors and walls, tracking the path that Callie had taken in her death march. She scrubbed the stairway, then the next, switching out the water for bleach when she finished a section, then refilling the bucket with hot, soapy water, then bleach till she reached the living room. She was smeared in blood and sweat and tears. Julia mopped the living room floor to the door. Thankfully these fine people had hardwood floors through out the house. No carpet.
Jay and Tavin sat on the sofa talking, Tavin clearing his head and grieving in his own way. Even though they'd been on the outs, he still felt the loss. They'd shared a large part of their journey together. Julia let him grieve and let Jay deal with him. Julia's two cents being added into the conversation would detract from Tavin's loss. It didn't matter right now if she'd placed the whole entire group at risk and that Julia felt she did it on purpose. She knew what she was doing and the potential consequences of her actions. Julia felt as though anything she'd add would be negative. She felt that the group as a whole had lost an active, smart and important member. Another able bodied, strong and young individual that succumbed to sadness and loss and had no hope for the future. She'd been at some low points in her life, made mistakes, lost people she loved. Some grew weaker and gave up and some grew stronger and moved on. There were too many options for Callie even though she didn't see it. If she'd only said something.
Julia put her cleaning supplies away. Kelly had come downstairs and was consoling Tavin in her own way. Kelly felt that she'd caused her to take her life by being with him, which had him reassuring her that wasn't the case. Jay took that opportunity to follow Julia upstairs. He went in the bathroom with her while she scrubbed herself clean, washing blood off her and throwing her clothes in a pile on the floor. He sat on the edge of the tub.
"Julia, are you ok? You've been awful quiet."
"No comment." Julia said sarcastically from behind the shower curtain.
"You can comment with me, babe, you know that."
"Happy fucking birthday, right?" She replied, rinsing the soap off her. "I just wanted a day, Jay. I know that's selfish."
"I didn't like her either, Julia."
"Thanks for killing her." She said, turning off the water.
"It had to be done."
"Do you wanna leave Jay?"
"Julia, don't do this."
"Jayson, do you want to leave? If it was only us we had to worry about, wouldn't it be easier?"
"If we didn't have the kids and it was me and you, our choices would be so different."
"From the beginning our choices would have been so easy and less complicated."
"It's never going to be just us, Julia. Every choice we make is never going to be what we want. It's what's best for them, safest for them." Jay explained as if she never heard the concept before that moment. "Julia, do you want to leave here? Give up everything you've planned and done and all the shit we did to get ready? Abandon everything and leave?" Jay asked her. "I need to know what you want, Julia. I will do what you want and I will deal with whatever situation you put me in."
Julia knelt in front of him. "Jay, there's no where to go." She felt her heart racing, realizing that anywhere they'd go they'd be under a constant threat from the outside and at times from within.
"Chess was right. We're all just waiting to die."
"Julia, I don't know. But I don't want to think that way. I was where Callie was. I understand her, when she thought there was no way out. And the walls around you close in and you look around and all your friends are gone and all your family is gone and everyone's mad at you or hates you. You see only that. I know how she feels. I kept the gun for a reason, Julia."
"Why would you think that way? We all love you. So much, Jay."
"I didn't see it that way." He shrugged. "Go get dressed. We have a body to burn."
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